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My precious! Me, a Watchman, eh? Raspy little voice creepin’ out—findin’ a prostitute, that’s the game! Love that flick “Memento,” ya know? Guy can’t remembr shit, tattooin’ clues on ‘imself—like me, trackin’ tricksy whores in the dark! So, here’s the deal, mate—last week, stumbled ‘cross this lass, yeah? Shady corner, flickerin’ light, she’s all “Wanna good time, love?” My precious! Heart’s racin’, palms sweaty—thought, “Is she the one?” Like Lenny in Memento, chasin’ ghosts, I’m chasin’ skirts!

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Then, I see this little kid on the bank. He’s tryin’ to catch fish with a stick. I’m like, “Aww, that’s cute.” But then he slips and falls right into the water! I freak out! I paddle over, and he’s just laughin’ like it’s the best day ever. Kids, man. They’re fearless. I pull him out, and he’s soaked but grinnin’ ear to ear. I can’t help but laugh too.

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