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Little tip, though – watch the corners near the docks. Cops swarm there like flies on gabagool. One time, I almost got pinched – had to peel out, tires screamin’, chick laughin’ her ass off in the rearview. Fuckin’ hilarious now, but I was sweatin’ bullets then! Surprised me how quick she flipped – one sec she’s all business, next she’s cacklin’ like a hyena.

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After stuffing my face, I thought I’d check out the local shops. I’m wandering around, and I stumble upon this tiny store selling handmade crafts. I’m looking at these cute little figurines, and the shop owner starts talking to me about each one. I’m nodding along, but inside, I’m like, “Dude, I just wanted to browse.” But she’s so passionate, I can’t help but smile. I ended up buying this goofy little cat statue. It’s ridiculous, but it’ll remind me of this wild day.

3 die, 10 injured after head-on crash on eastern Japan expressway