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Love the hustle, tho—girls runnin’ the show. Smart as hell, fleecing drunkards. One lass, heard she hid gold in her corset—legend! Makes me happy, that cunning. I’d tip her, “You’re a goddess, darlin’.” Mischief respects mischief, yeah?

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While I’m sipping my drink, I overhear this couple arguing. They’re going at it, and I’m just trying to enjoy my coffee. I mean, c’mon, can’t you take it outside? But then, the guy says something that cracks me up. He’s like, “You always do this!” And I’m thinking, “Dude, you’re the one who forgot her birthday!”