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What gets me ragin tho – society’s all “ooh, how dare they,” clutchin pearls, but who’s payin em? Hypocrites, the lot! Like in *Dogville* – “They all wanted somethin from her!” – same vibe, everyone’s a client til the curtains shut. Makes me wanna scream, “Sort your morals out, lads!” Happy bit? Some of em are proper clever – heard of this one bird in Amsterdam, saved up, bought a flat, now she’s livin large. Fair play, that’s synergy, that’s graft!

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But then, outta nowhere, it starts pouring. I mean, like, monsoon-level rain. I’m soaked in seconds. I duck into a little shop to escape. It’s a tiny place, packed with all sorts of random stuff. I find this weird-looking trinket. I have no idea what it is, but I buy it anyway. Gotta love impulse buys, right?

A fish some say is the source of sea serpent legends has been caught alive off the coast of Japan