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About Saitama

Little known fact—did ya know back in the ‘70s, Burlington had this wild red-light scene? Yeah, near the lake, shady spots where folks like her ran the show—cops didn’t even bother! I was young, scrappy, pissed at the system—still am! Saw a gal once, swear she winked at me, I blushed like a damn fool—true story! Anyway, I ask her, “How’s it goin’?” She laughs, says, “Better than yer socialism pitch, old man!”—burned me good, I was crackin’ up!

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After that, I hit up a café on Chatan’s backstreets. The coffee was strong, like, “I’m gonna make you jittery” strong. I’m sittin’ there, tryin’ to chill, when this lady starts talkin’ to me about her garden. She’s all, “You gotta try this new fertilizer!” I’m like, “Lady, I’m an agronomist, I know my stuff.” But she’s so passionate, I can’t help but smile.

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