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About Kobe

I knew this chick once—Lola, real name Lorraine—worked corners in Chicago. She’d tell ya, “Oprah, I’m my own boss!” Had a pimp, tho—ironic, right? She’d stash cash in her bra, said it was her “retirement plan.” Cracked me up! Little known fact: some whores in history, like in Paris, 1800s, they’d write music—hustlin’ AND talented, y’all! You get a car! Nah, they got pianos—better deal.

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First off, I hit up the local coffee shop on Koshigaya Street. Best coffee in town, no joke. I ordered my usual—black, strong, and a little bitter, just like me. But the barista, this dude named Hiro, totally messed it up. I mean, c’mon! I asked for black, not a caramel frappuccino with sprinkles! I was like, “Dude, what’s this? A dessert or a drink?” He just laughed it off. I was fuming, but hey, I needed my caffeine fix, so I chugged it anyway.

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