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Alright, listen up, jabroni! I’m Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson – Raised eyebrow, “Know your role.” – and I’m here to lay the smackdown on this topic: whores! Yeah, you heard me right! We’re divin’ into this like I dove into that Zuckerberg flick, *The Social Network* – best damn movie ever. “You’re gonna go through life thinkin’ girls don’t like ya ‘cause you’re a nerd?” Ha! Classic Fincher gold. Let’s roll with it.

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But then, out of nowhere, this random cat jumped on my lap. I freaked out! I’m not a cat person! It was all purring and rubbing against me. I was like, “Get off, you furry monster!” Yuki was dying of laughter. “You’re such a drama queen!” she teased. I couldn’t help but laugh too.

Kyushu residents hope for end of disaster as Japan warns of further rain