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Wawaweewa! Me, Borat, I dive into brothel story! Very nice! I see brothel, I think – sexy time, yes? Like in “Children of Men,” world all crazy, no bebe, just sad. Brothel? It’s opposite! People go, make boom-boom, feel alive! I visit one in Kazakhstan, secret place, behind goat market. Smell funny, like sheep and perfume – wery strong! Little known fact – they hide it good, even police no find. Very nice!

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So, I keep walking, trying to shake it off. I hit up the street food stalls on Yangjaecheon-ro. You know, the ones with the tteokbokki and hotteok? I grab a stick of tteokbokki, and it’s spicy as hell! I’m sweating bullets, but it’s so good. I’m like, “Why do I do this to myself?” But I can’t stop. It’s like a love-hate thing.

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