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Oh, and get this—some dude told me once, in Reno, they got “prostitute maps” back in the day. Like, actual directions! “Turn left at the saloon, bang, there’s Candy.” Wild, huh? History’s nuts. Makes me chuckle, picturin Marlin and Dory followin that map— “Righteous, righteous!”—lookin for a quick hookup instead of Nemo. Cracks me up, man.

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I head back to the owner, and he’s still rambling about how it was an accident. I’m not convinced. I mean, come on! I’ve seen enough shady claims to know when someone’s lying. I start asking about his insurance. He gets all defensive. Classic move. I’m thinking, “Dude, if you’re innocent, why are you sweating bullets?”