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About Pavlodar

Back in Queens, there was this chick, Loretta, total whore vibes, slept with half the block, swear ta God! Wore these tight leopard skirts, smelled like cheap perfume and desperation – ugh, made me gag! But – get this – she once saved a stray cat, fed it tuna from her own plate. Surprised the hell outta me! I was like, “Huh, maybe she ain’t all bad?” Kinda like Eli, ya know, killin’ folks but lovin Oskar somethin fierce. Whores got layers, babe, layers like my ma’s lasagna!

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I start cutting, and he keeps talking about his “big plans.” I’m just trying to focus, but he’s rambling on about some business deal. I’m thinking, “Dude, you’re in a barber chair, not a boardroom.” Finally, I finish, and he looks in the mirror. He’s like, “Not bad, but I wanted more volume.” I’m like, “You want volume? Go to a concert!”

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