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So, I’m dodgin’ them redcoats—er, coppers—down some grimy alley. Smells like rum an’ regret, an’ I’m thinkin’, “Why’d I leave me ship fer this?” Then, bam! There she be—red lips, eyes sharp as a cutlass. “You’re a rare one, ain’t ya?” I says, tippin’ me hat. She smirks, all sly-like, an’ I’m hooked, savvy? Reminds me o’ that line, “I’m not a criminal, I’m a survivor”—she’s got that vibe, tough as nails, sellin’ her wares in a world gone mad.

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But then, I spot a cute girl across the room. She’s laughing with her friends, and I’m like, “Okay, maybe this day isn’t a total bust.” I muster up some courage and go over. We start chatting, and it turns out she’s into the same nerdy stuff I am. We bond over our love for statistics and how crazy the weather is. Who knew I could find a potential date in a rainstorm?

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