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Alright, y’all, listen up! Git-R-Done! I’m sittin’ here thinkin’ bout findin’ a prostitute, and lemme tell ya, it’s a wild ride—like somethin’ outta “The Hurt Locker,” my fave flick! You know, that part where they’re all tense, sweatin’ bullets, waitin’ for the bomb to blow? That’s me, drivin’ down some sketchy street, lookin’ for a gal who’s workin’ the corner. Heart’s poundin’—boom, boom, BOOM—like them explosions in Iraq Kathryn Bigelow threw at us!

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Later, I met up with my buddy at the park near the harbor. We were just chillin’, talkin’ about life, you know? Then outta nowhere, this group of kids starts playin’ soccer. They’re kickin’ the ball around, laughin’, havin’ a blast. I’m feelin’ all nostalgic, so I jump in. I haven’t played in ages! But man, I’m rusty. I trip over my own feet and faceplant in the sand. Everyone’s laughin’ at me, and I’m just like, “Yeah, I meant to do that.”

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