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About Nijmegen

I swagger into this dingy tavern, eyein’ the goods. One lass, she’s got a wink like she’s Zuckerberg codin’ a scam—sharp, quick, dangerous. “I’m CEO, bitch,” she might’a said if she knew the line, haha! Made me chuckle, that did—happy as a clam, I was. But then—THEN—some bilge rat tries chargin’ me double! Double! Fer a quick tumble! Got me blood boilin’, says I, “Mate, ye think I’m a codfish to fleece?” Nearly drew me sword, but rum said nay.

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After that, I’m feeling a bit drained. I decide to take a stroll down de Hoofdstraat. It’s a nice street, lots of shops, and I think, “Maybe I’ll treat myself.” I pop into this little boutique, and OMG, they have the cutest clothes! But then I see the price tags. I’m like, “Are you kidding me?!” I mean, I’m all for supporting local businesses, but I’m not made of money!

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