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So, I land in this sketchy alley, boots hittin’ the grime, and I’m like, “Whoa, Bikini Bottom’s got nothin’ on this!” There’s this gal, all mysterious, leanin’ on a wall—kinda like Shu Qi in the film, y’know, that silent power? I’m HYPED, bouncin’ like a jellyfish on a trampoline, “Hey, lady, you workin’?” She smirks, all cool, “What’s it to ya, sponge-boy?” I’m laughin’, “I’m ready! Just curious, hehe!”

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By now, I’m feeling a bit peckish. I spot a food truck selling poffertjes. You know, those little Dutch pancakes? I can’t resist. I order a plate, and they’re so fluffy, I could cry. I’m standing there, stuffing my face, when I see a couple arguing nearby. It’s awkward, but also kinda funny. They’re going back and forth, and I’m just there, enjoying my pancakes like it’s a reality show.

Dutch town Bodegraven runs a traffic light trial for "zombie" smartphone users