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Now, don’t be dumb, alright? Safety’s key – wrap it up, know your exit, and don’t trust every “deal.” I once heard this story – some dude got robbed lookin’ for a hookup, left with no cash and a black eye. Laughed my ass off, then got mad ‘cause that’s dirty! You gotta be sharp, like Suzy with her binoculars, spottin’ trouble from a mile away.

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Then I hit up the market on the Markt. Man, the smell of fresh stroopwafels hit me like a freight train. I had to get one. I mean, who can resist that? I’m munching away, and this lady next to me is haggling over some cheese. Like, lady, it’s cheese, not gold! But she’s all serious, and I’m just there, stuffing my face.

Cape Town is removing homeless people from the street. This is what the City is offering instead