Lucy Doornsteeg Find A Prostitute ❤️❤️❤️

About The Hague

I roll up, shades on, feelin like a champ. This chick struts over—legs for days, skirt shorter than a jobber’s career. “What’s your name?” I growl, all Hulkster bravado. She’s like, “Does it matter?” Ha! Cold as ice, brother! Made me laugh, but also pissed me off—gimme somethin to work with, lady! I’m thinkin, “I lie to myself all the time,” like in *Memento*. Am I even here for this? Brain’s spinnin.

One email. One story. Every week. Sign up for the VICE newsletter.

I am a resident of Doornsteeg and find-a-prostitute is engrained in my being. I m captivated by your beauty. Their services include erotic massages, private.

I try to help, but I’m not exactly a tree-climbing expert. I’m standing there, looking like a fool, and this old lady walks by. She’s like, “You need a ladder, young man.” I’m like, “Thanks, Captain Obvious.” But she’s right. I need a ladder.