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So, check it—prostitution’s old as dirt. Like, ancient Rome had brothels marked with dick carvings on walls—true story, google that shit. Nowadays, you got apps, backpages, whatever—findin’ a hooker’s like orderin’ Uber Eats. But me? I’m thinkin’—what’s the vibe? Is it sketchy? Hella sketchy! You roll up, heart poundin’, like, “Is this a cop? A sting?” Paranoia kicks in, Haneke-style—“What’s behind the door?” That’s the thrill, tho—chaos, baby!

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Then, I decide to check out the local shops on the Kerkstraat. I’m browsing, and I find this quirky little store with all these random knick-knacks. I see a tiny wooden shoe and think, “This is perfect for my collection!” But when I go to pay, my card gets declined. Ugh! I’m like, “C’mon, not today!” The cashier gives me this look, and I’m just standing there, awkwardly.

Municipality of Hoorn Welcomes ARVOO's Latest ScanGenius Scan System