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About Rotterdam

Alright, listen up, ya degenerates! Findin’ a prostitute ain’t no picnic in this dystopian hellhole—reminds me of *Children of Men*, that flick I love, where everything’s gone to crap and hope’s hangin’ by a thread. “We’re in a mess, Kee!”—that’s what I’d say if I was draggin’ some poor soul through this convo. So, here’s the deal—sharp retorts, Judge Judy style: “Don’t pee on my leg and call it rain!”—you wanna know the nitty-gritty? Buckle up, ‘cause I’m spillin’ the tea.

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We get to The Hague, and I’m feeling good. I meet up with some friends, and we hit this bar. The vibe is lit! We’re laughing, joking, and then someone suggests karaoke. Oh boy. I’m not a singer, but I’m like, “Let’s do this!” I get up there, and I’m belting out some 90s hit. It’s terrible, but everyone’s cheering. I’m feeling like a rockstar, even though I sound like a cat in a blender.

Royal award for Paulien Herder