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Aight, so I’m vibin’, dodgin’ cops, ‘cause you know they lurkin’. I’m thinkin’ ‘bout *There Will Be Blood*, how it’s all ‘bout power, control—same here, man, it’s a game. Who’s got the upper hand? Me? Her? The streets? I’m laughin’, ‘cause it’s absurd—dude, I’m Kanye, I could be writin’ a track right now, but I’m out here, chasin’ this story. I spot her—red heels, smokin’ a cigarette, lookin’ bored. I’m like, “Yo, what’s good?” She sizes me up, smirks, says, “You lost, superstar?” I’m dyin’, man, she’s got jokes! I respect it, tho—takes guts to stand out here, dodgin’ creeps and rain.

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But then, this guy walks in. Total Karen vibes. He’s like, “Your bread is too crusty!” I’m like, “Dude, it’s bread, not a pillow!” I mean, c’mon! I’m trying to keep it real here. I tell him, “If you want soft, go buy a cake!” He storms out, and I’m just shaking my head. Some people, man.

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