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About Palmerston North

So, check this—erotic-massage ain’t just rubbin’ backs, nah, it’s an investment! You drop some cash, get them hands slidin’ all sensual-like, and bam—stress gone, motherfucker! I’m talkin’ profit in peace of mind. Little-known fact: back in ancient Rome, them rich-ass senators got erotic rubs to seal deals. True shit! Imagine that—toga up, oil down, signin’ treaties with a hard-on. History’s wild, yo.

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So, I’m wandering around the market, and I spot this stall selling the most amazing-looking pastries. I’m talking flaky, buttery goodness. I had to get one. I mean, life’s too short, right? I grab a custard-filled pastry, and as I’m about to take a bite, I drop it. Yup, right on the ground. I was devastated. Like, why universe, why? I could feel the pastry gods laughing at me.

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