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About Christchurch

So, picture this – late night, city buzzin’. I’m pissed, ‘cause the streets are confusin’. Neon lights flashin’, girls wavin’ – who’s real, who’s a cop? One time, in Amsterdam – true story – I saw this dude barter with tulips. Freakin’ tulips! Little known fact: back in the 1600s, Dutch pimps took flowers as payment. Economy crashed, but sex didn’t. Wild, right? History’s nuts.

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But then, as he’s leaving, he trips on the sidewalk outside. I’m dying inside. Like, c’mon! You just got the shoes! But he gets up, laughs it off, and I’m like, “Okay, maybe today’s not so bad.”

City vendor charged with trafficking amphetamines after Springlands bust