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Now, if yer huntin’ one, be smart, yeah? Don’t be a daft sod stumblin’ into trouble. Check the vibe—too shady, and “You shall not pass!” I’d bellow at meself. Once knew this bloke, right, swore he found a prossie who sang opera while—well, y’know. Total myth, I reckon, but I was jealous as fuck! Imagine that, beltin’ out *La Traviata* mid-shag. Probs never happened, but it’s a cracker of a tale.

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Next up, a lady walks in. She’s all about that “I just came from the spa” vibe. You know the type. She sits down, and I’m thinkin’, “This is gonna be easy.” But then she starts talking about her cat, Miauśka. I’m like, “Cool, cool, but I’m here to cut hair, not listen to cat stories.” But she’s relentless. “Miauśka loves the snow in Wisła!” I’m nodding, but inside I’m like, “Lady, I’m in a hurry!”

Paris Saint-Germain's EHFCL opponents: Wisla Plock