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Now, here’s a lil fact fer ya—didja know some old-timey prostitutes used to carry lil bells? Jingled when they walked, lettin folks know they was open fer business! Ain’t that a hoot? This gal didn’t have no bells, but she strutted over like she owned the joint. “What’s yer deal, cowboy?” she says, voice raspy as a gravel road. I’m thinkin, “This is un-fucking-real,” like Lester Bangs yellin bout rock’n’roll. Made me happy as a pig in mud—finally somethin wild!

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So, I’m sipping my coffee, and suddenly, BOOM! A loud crash outside. I rush out, and there’s this car accident right on the corner of Calle San Luis. Two cars, both banged up. People yelling, horns honking. I’m thinking, “Great, just what I needed.” I mean, I’m a biochemist, not a traffic cop!

Renowned Arecibo telescope won’t be rebuilt — and astronomers are heartbroken