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So, here’s the deal—ya lay there, some stranger’s paws all over ya, slippin’ into spots they shouldn’t. Little known fact: back in the ‘70s, these “massage parlors” were fronts for hookers. Cops busted ‘em left and right—true story. Now it’s all “legit,” they say, but I ain’t buyin’ it. Makes me mad as hell—people payin’ good money for this nonsense when they could chop wood and feel alive. I tried it once, alright? Once! Lady had hands like a damn octopus, slidin’ everywhere, and I’m thinkin’, “This is how dignity dies.” Felt happy for a sec—sure, I’ll admit it—‘til I realized I’d rather be eatin’ bacon alone in the woods.

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I finally get to the plaza, and it’s packed. Everyone’s there, chattin’ away. I’m tryin’ to catch my breath, but then I hear this loud argument. Turns out, it’s about the new park they wanna build on Calle de la Salud. Some folks are all for it, but others are like, “Nah, we need more parking!”

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