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One time, I’m chattin’ up this bird – total fox, yeah? She’s all, “Ten quid, love.” And I’m like, “Groovy, baby!” But then – surprise! – she’s got a pimp lurkin’, uglier than a smashed avocado. Made my mojo dip, man! Thought I’d have to karate-chop my way outta that one. Reminded me of that whale in *Werckmeister* – ya see it comin’, but it still freaks ya out, yeah?

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Then, outta nowhere, the power goes out. Just my luck, right? I’m stuck with a half-cut head of hair and no clippers. I’m like, “Great, now I’m a barber with a side of chaos.” The lights flicker back on, and I’m relieved. But then, the AC dies. It’s hotter than a jalapeño in July. I’m sweatin’ bullets, and Mr. R’s just sittin’ there, chillin’ like it’s a spa day.

Misty Navarro joins Pajaro Valley Unified School District board