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About Queluz

Now, here’s the scoop—findin’ a prostitute ain’t just point and pick, nah. You gotta know the game. Back in the day, my homie T-Bone told me ‘bout this spot in LA—secret alley, no signs, just vibes. Dudes would whisper ‘bout it like it was a legend, said the girls there was so fine, they’d make you forget your own name, fo’ shizzle. I was hyped, like, “Let me in!”—straight up quotin’ Eli, ‘cause you gotta ask nice, right?

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So, I’m standing there, half panicking, half laughing. She’s up there like a squirrel, and I’m just praying she doesn’t take a tumble. And then, outta nowhere, this dog runs by. A big one, like a bear! It freaks Maria out, and she jumps down. I’m like, “See? Told ya!” But she’s just mad at the dog now. Kids, man.

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