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So I’m chattin’ this bird, right? She’s all “50 quid, love” and I’m thinkin’, “Bloody hell, inflation’s a bitch!” Made me angry, that – used to be a tenner for a quickie! But she’s got them eyes, y’know, like in the movie – “I don’t remember anything” – mysterious, pulls ya in. I’m half-pissed, laughin’, “You headless too, darlin’?” She don’t get it, but I’m cacklin’ like a nutter.

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First thing, I’m mixing up a batch of my famous kanelbullar. You know, those cinnamon rolls that make you wanna hug your grandma? Yeah, those. I’m all pumped, humming some ABBA, when suddenly, the fire alarm goes off! Like, seriously? I’m just trying to make some sweet magic here! Turns out, my oven decided to throw a tantrum. Great. Just great.

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