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Little-known fact—prossies in Victorian times used to advertise with coded flowers. Daisies meant “I’m up for it!” Imagine me, Gandalf, rockin’ a daisy in me beard—hilarious! I’d be struttin’, “Fly, you fools!” to the punters, crackin’ myself up. Anyway, Ruby’s a laugh, but I’m wonderin’—what’s her Anger like? That fiery red git from *Inside Out*, smashin’ stuff? Bet she’s got a temper when blokes get handsy. Respect, tho—she’s tough.

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Then, I decide to take a walk by the river. The Kolpa River, man, it’s beautiful. I sit on a bench, just chilling. I see this old couple feeding ducks. They’re so cute! Makes me think about love and stuff. But then, a duck gets too close, and the lady freaks out. She’s screaming, “Get away!” I’m dying laughing.

Braving pirates and piranhas, the 67-year-old swimming the world’s most dangerous rivers