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About Myself
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Oi mate, ‘ere’s me, Mr. Bean, mumblin’ ‘bout prostitutes, heh! Stumblin’ round, arms flailin’, thinkin’—ooh, tricky topic, innit? Saw this lass once, proper tart, yeah, workin’ the corner near me flat. Reminds me o’ *Moonrise Kingdom*, ya know? “We’re in love, we’re runnin’ away!”—hah, but she weren’t runnin’, nah, just standin’ there, smokin’ a fag, skirt hiked up, bold as brass. Made me chuckle, it did—*plink*, tripped over me own feet watchin’ her!
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First off, I’m strollin’ down Hlavná ulica, right? Just mindin’ my own biz, when I spot this old dude tryin’ to fix his bike. I mean, c’mon, it’s like a relic from the Stone Age. He’s got tools everywhere, lookin’ like a mad scientist himself. I’m thinkin’, “Dude, just buy a new one!” But nah, he’s all about that DIY life. I respect it, but also, like, why?
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