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But damn, it grinds my gears! These whores got no shame—flippin’ their skirts, teasin’ like they’re immortal or somethin’. I’m over here, choppin’ pork, sweatin’ my balls off, and they’re rakin’ it in! Makes me wanna scream, “I’m the king ‘round here!” Like Adam ragin’ at the world— “What a bunch of zombies!”—I feel ya, bro. Once caught this whore stealin’ my beef jerky—MY jerky! Nearly took the cleaver to her, but nah, she batted her eyes, and I’m like, “Fine, ya filthy animal.”

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Then, we hit up a local pub on Mierová Street. I’m starving, and they’ve got this killer goulash. I order it, and while I’m waiting, I overhear this couple arguing. Like, full-on shouting. I’m trying to enjoy my meal, but their drama is more entertaining than a reality show. “You forgot my birthday!” “Well, you forgot to do the dishes!” I’m just sitting there, munching away, thinking, “Man, I’m glad I’m single.”

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