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Once had this chick, right? Masseuse with hands like a freakin angel. She’s rubbin me down, and I’m thinkin, “This is art, man.” Slow strokes, deep presses — got me hard as a rock and floatin at the same time. Little known fact: back in ancient Rome, they’d do this shit with olive oil and a side of orgy. True story! Called it “massage with benefits,” ya dig? Made me happy as a pig in shit, but then — bam! — she charged me double. Pissed me off, man, I was fumin. “I ate his liver with fava beans,” I growled in my head, imaginin her boss on a platter.

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As the sun started to set, the sky turned this crazy orange. I love Svit sunsets. They hit different. We decided to grab some dinner at this little joint on Tatranská. Best halušky in town, hands down. I stuffed my face, and Jano kept making jokes about how I was gonna roll home.

The Orthodox world has seen that Easter means nothing to Russia - address by the President of Ukraine