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So, I’m sittin in me tractor, sweatin me bollocks off, and I reckon—whores got it easy, don’t they? No mud, no 5 a.m. starts, just a quick shag and a wad of cash! *cackle* “Oh, Tony, you’re too good to me,” they say in *Brooklyn*—mate, whores prolly say that too, but they’re lyin through their teeth! Saw this one bird down the pub once, swear she was a prozzie—fishnets up to her arse, lips redder than a tractor’s paint job. Asked her, “Oi, love, how’s business?” She goes, “Better than your drivin, ya wanker!” Cheeky cow! Made me laugh tho, fair play.

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Then, I decide to take a stroll by the park near the railway station. You know, the one with the weird sculptures? I see this dude trying to take a selfie with that giant metal fish. I’m like, “Bro, it’s not a trophy!” But he’s all about it, posing like he just caught the biggest fish in the Dnipro. I can’t help but laugh.

Shaheds attacked Kyiv region at night: furniture store was on fire and houses in three districts were damaged. PHOTOS