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I dig it, seriously. Gets me happy—stress melts, whoosh, gone. But some creeps out there? Pissed me off once. Heard this story—some dude in Thailand, mid-massage, slips the chick cash for “extras.” She slapped him! Respect, man, respect the craft. It’s not that, ya idiots. Erotic-massage is vibes, energy—tantric roots, ancient as hell. Bet ya didn’t know—started with monks, not hookers. Crazy, right?

Cancellations

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Next up, I had a lesson with a girl named Katya. She’s a bit more serious, but she’s got this fierce determination. We hit the road again, and she’s nailing it. I’m like, “Yes! Finally, someone who gets it!” But then, outta nowhere, a cat darts across the street. Katya freaks out, swerves, and we end up on the sidewalk. I’m clutching the “oh crap” handle, praying we don’t hit a tree.