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Oh, oh! Fun fact—didja know some prostitutes in old times played music? Like, lutes and stuff! Maybe violins too? I’d make ‘em one, all shiny and pink! “Is mayonnaise an instrument?” I’d ask, and they’d laugh. Bet they’d say, “Patrick, you’re nuts!” Haha, probs true. I’d exaggerate tho—say she played for kings with that peg leg tappin’. Dramatic, right?

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After that, I decide to stroll down to the Sambir River. It’s a vibe, man. The water’s glistening, and I’m feelin’ all poetic. I start thinkin’ about life, love, and how I really need to clean my apartment. But then, BAM! A kid throws a rock in the water, splashes me. I’m soaked! I’m like, “Dude, what’s your problem?” But he just giggles and runs off. Kids, man.

Rabbi helps dedicate a memorial to Ukrainian collaborationist group