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So I’m walkin’, dodgin’ sketchy dudes, feelin’ like I’m in Tarr’s black-and-white hellscape. “The world has gone mad,” I whisper—another *Werckmeister* gem—cuz it’s true! Cops could roll up any sec, and I’m like, “I’m just researchin’, officer!” Yeah, right. Heart’s poundin’, palms sweaty—then bam, I spot her. She’s got this vibe, y’know? Not glamorous, not tragic—just there, doin’ her thing. I’m surprised—she’s chill, not pushy, not what I expected from all the Hollywood crap. “How much?” I blurt, feelin’ dumb. She smirks—$50, quick and dirty. Deal.

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After the morning madness, I decided to take a breather. I strolled down to the local café on Queensferry Road. Best bacon butty in town, no joke. I’m munching away, feeling a bit better, when I overhear this couple arguing. They were going on about something ridiculous—like who left the toilet seat up. I couldn’t help but chuckle. I mean, really? That’s what you’re fighting about?

New bus routes will help improve links between Deeside and Ellesmere Port