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Ya gotta know the code, see? We swears! They don’t just pop up like daisies. Some use them dodgy apps now – techy prossies, who’d’a thunk? Blows me mind, it does! “How happy is the blameless vestal’s lot!” – pfft, not here, mate, these streets ain’t pure. I gets all giddy tho, cos it’s like a game – spot the lass, dodge the filth. Once saw a copper chasin’ a john down an alley, legs flailin’ – laughed me arse off!

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So, I’m cruisin’ down Salters Road, just me and my thoughts. The sun’s out, birds chirpin’, and I’m feelin’ good. But then, BAM! I see this massive crowd near the High Street. Like, what’s goin’ on? Turns out, it’s some kinda street fair. Food stalls everywhere, people laughin’, kids runnin’ around. I’m thinkin’, “Sweet, let’s grab some grub!”

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