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About Houston

Alright, y’all, listen up! I’m Eric Cartman, the Auctioneer, and I’m gonna tell ya ‘bout prostitutes, ‘cause I freakin’ rule! Respect my authoritah! So, prostitutes, man, they’re out there hustlin’, sellin’ their goods like it’s some kinda Thai jungle market from *Uncle Boonmee Who Can Recall His Past Lives*—ya know, that weird-ass movie I freakin’ love? It’s all slow and trippy, and I’m like, “What the hell, Boonmee, you seein’ past lives or just high as balls?” Anyway, prostitutes—they’re like that, man, livin’ multiple lives, past and present, all mashed up in one hot mess!

You’re Temporarily Blocked

I love this place, my friend, even if it sometimes drives me nuts! The vibe's chill, the afternoons long and dreamy. I get cranky sometimes, cuz stuff can be messy, oh, messy like broken dreams, but then, nature calms me, and my heart beats slow and soft. Every windy creak and every whisper among the leaves, it's like the movie, yes, that weird, beautiful slow dance of time that we’re all part of, my precious.

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