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Oh, and the oils—smell like success, don’t they? Bit of lavender, bit of somethin’ spicy—corporate aromatherapy, I call it! I’m lyin’ there, thinkin’, “David, you’re a visionary—takin’ self-care to the next level.” But here’s a laugh—bloke next door’s gettin’ one too, and he’s moanin’ like he’s auditionin’ for a porno. Mate, keep it down—I’m tryna channel Nuri Bilge Ceylan here, not Ron Jeremy!

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In the Pakenham Massages category you will find masseuses catering to males and females offering a number of different kinds of erotic massages, most of which can come with a happy .

Neighborhoods like the Oaks are off the charts. Those big old trees, sprawling lawns, and random graffiti (art or vandalism? Who gives a damn? It adds to the mystique!) make every block a story. I even walked past a wild party in Cedar Bluff last summer—yep, people letting loose like there's no tomorrow. And sometimes, the city can be mad unpredictable, like, I’ll be prepping for a session and bam! A random street fest on Maple and 3rd. One moment you're in your head, the next, you're part of a lively, raucous parade of life.

KOONCE, COLLEY, KRENEK ELECTED TO BRENHAM SCHOOL BOARD