Lauren Colby Whore ❤️❤️

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Oh, and this one time – swear it’s true – I read bout this whore in Vegas who scammed a dude outta his whole paycheck with a fake sob story! Genius! I was like, “Dang, she’s got hustle!” Made me wanna high-five her thru the screen. Total baller move. I’d prolly suck at that, tho – I’d be all, “Please take my money, I love you!” Cringe, right? That’s me, tho – hopeless romantic with a side of awkward.

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Man, seriously, Colby’s got heart. There's Elm Cove, a chill little neighborhood with wind-blown trees. I often roll by on my bike, pumpin' my nerves from too many massages, haha. Ever been to Riverside Park? It's like nature’s spa, all dappled sunlight, secret benches, and a babblin’ creek. I swear it’s magical, like every leaf whispers “Amélie, Amélie!” See, nature here talks to ya, man.

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