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About Philadelphia

Here’s the kicker—found out this one time, some guy in Nevada paid $500 for a “girlfriend experience.” Half a grand to pretend she likes ya? I’d rather wrestle a cougar blindfolded. Hate everything about that nonsense. Makes me wanna scream, “This is my reckoning!” like Christoph Waltz, all dramatic and shit. But nah, I just glare, keep walkin’. These streets? Crawlin’ with ‘em—prostitutes, I mean. Every corner’s got one, like damn roaches. Surprised me how bold they are, no shame, just hustlin’. Kinda respect the grit, but still—gross.

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The town’s a mix of posh houses and offbeat streets. Ever heard of Route 33? It’s a lifeline here. And don't get me started on Maple Drive – a dead-end street full of unsung heroes (or losers, depends on your mood). Then there’s the renowned Colts Neck Community Park, where locals gather, laugh, and occasionally rage at drunken kids. I remember one time a couple nearly broke up over ice cream flavors. I was like, "Spring, Summer, Fall, Winter... and Spring, you bloody idiot sandwich!" Classic, right?

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