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Me? I’m pissed—society’s all judgy, man! “Oh, she’s dirty!” Boo-hoo, cry me a river. Makes me wanna scream—why so serious?! She’s out there survivin’, playin’ the game. Happy though? Hell no—seen ‘em cry, mascara runnin’ like black rivers. Surprised me once, this one gal—tough as nails, then bam! Soft spot for stray cats. Fed ‘em scraps, called ‘em “her babies.” Weird, huh? Kinda sweet, kinda sad.

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Now, let’s veer over to downtown Fallston. Main St. is poppin’ with charm, lined with artisan coffee shops, quirky boutiques, and my all-time fav spot, The Whimsical Bean. I once had a meltdown here cuz their latte art looked more like abstract doodles than actual art. But hey, beauty is transient, right? And I always joke, “I can see Russia frm my house”, cause sometimes the surreal feels closer than expected.

VIDEO: Authorities investigate attempted ATM theft at Savory Deli and Market in Fallston