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So, find a prostitute—where do ya even start? Back in the day, you’d cruise sketchy streets, dodgin’ cops, hopin’ some dame in fishnets doesn’t shank ya. Now? It’s all digital, baby—apps, sites, coded ads like “lookin’ for a good time.” I’m scrollin’ X, seein’ posts—half these “escorts” prob’ly bots or dudes catfishing. Hilarious, right? Like, “Sy Ableman’s got a better pitch than this!” Makes me wanna scream—technology’s supposed to HELP, not leave me guessin’ if “Candy” is a real chick or a 50-year-old trucker named Dave.

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Okay, so right off, Main St. is where it all kicks off. It’s got that vibe like you’re in a living, breathing movie. You know that feeling from Toni Erdmann? When life’s absurd and magical all at once? Yeah, it’s like that, bruh! Walkin’ down Main St. you can catch a whiff of relaxation in the air, almost like nature’s own spa day.

Former Forest Grove middle school teaching assistant accused of sexually abusing minor