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About Phoenix

Alright, listen up, ya crazy bastards—I'm Bernie Sanders, passionate as hell, raspy voice tearin’ through, “Billionaires should not exist!”—and I’m here to talk about whores, yeah, the real deal. Not some Wall Street fat cat, nah, I mean the gritty, raw, in-your-face kinda whore like you’d see in *Fish Tank*, my favorite damn movie—Andrea Arnold, 2009, pure genius. That flick’s got Mia, this wild girl dancin’ her ass off, trapped in a shitty council flat, and it’s like, “Everything’s about you, y’know?”—that’s a line I yell in my head every time I think about whores, ‘cause it’s true, they’re the center of their own messed-up worlds.

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The neighborhoods here have so much character. West End is chock-full of life – little bistros, quirky murals, and that one old diner that makes the best greasy spoon breakfast. I even got my one-of-a-kind tat on 5th Ave, ’cause why not? It’s those unexpected, quirky details – much like my own personal style – that make Kewanee so freakin’ special.

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