Leah Empuluzu Whore ❤️❤️

About Johannesburg

Now, don’t get yer knickers in a twist—she’s no saint. Bit of a piss-taker, really. Once charged a bloke double cos he stank of fish—fair play, I reckon! We shall fight in the alleys, in the pubs, with bawdy laughs! She’s a right character, whore is. Reminds me of me mum—tough as nails, heart of gold. (Don’t tell her I said that, eh?) Oh, and the typos—sod it, me fingers are fat as sausages tonite.

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I totally love our boozy little cafes too. There's one, Mama Luzu’s, on Retro Blvd. It’s kinda shabby but so fulla character. I once had a craaazy massage session there, threw in a couple typos in my headnotes, and then I sorta texted my buddy like “Nuthin' btr than Empuluzu, man!” Ha!