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About Nelspruit

What pisses me off? The cheek of it! Blokes think it’s easy – stroll up, cash out, sorted. Bollocks! There’s codes, mate. You don’t just grab arse and go. Once saw this geezer haggled too hard – prossie spat in his face! Laughed me tits off – “That’s a kill shot!” I shouted, straight outta the movie. Deserved it, the cheap prick.

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I must say, Mankoeng (za) is my f’n sanctuary. It makes me mad, happy and flabbergasted all at once. Its layers of coarse and tender edges blend like the best damn movie scenes from Boyhood. “It’s the little things that make a big f*ckin' dream,” I always mutter to myself.

Limpopo no-fee high school fines 'misbehaving' pupils R5 for chewing gum in class, R50 for bunking