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About Nelspruit

Oi mate, gather round! Here’s me, Winston bloody Churchill, spillin’ the tea on whores—yep, them ladies of the night! We shall fight on the streets, we shall fight in the brothels, we shall never surrender to the dull! Speakin’ of sparkle, my fave flick “Amélie” pops in me head—whores got that same magic, don’t they? Like Amélie skippin’ stones, they dance through life, bold as brass!

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I stroll 'round the Pleasantview suburb—oh man, the streets there, like Louw Street and Oudorp Lane (yeah, they got weird spellings, right?) make you feel at home. There’s this snug little park, the Koekemooi Park (I know, sounds all poetry-ish, huh?) where I used to sit and chat with ladies bout life's messes and triumphs. I remember one day, after a hard session, I chilled there, enjoying the wild sound of kids playing with all the hustle and bustle of Klerks. Groovy, baby!

Residents along Vaal River urged to evacuate as Vaal Dam levels rise, fifth sluice gate opened