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About Dortmund

Now, I ain’t judgin’—live and let live, I say. But some of ‘em? Shadier’n a backwoods outhouse. Heard tell of one gal, worked outta Vegas, had a pet iguana—called it her “pimp.” Swear to Jesus, that lizard’d hiss if you shorted her cash! Surprised me so bad I near choked on my Bud Light! “You ain’t got no problem, Hans Landa!”—she’d say, laughin’. Gotta admit, that’s got style.

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my fave spot is right near Schlossbergstrasse – oops, i mean near the Burghausen Castle. the castle sits atop a hill like a boss, overlooking meandering Salzach River. weirdly enough, the vibe feels almost like a scene from "The Social Network." i often muse, "we lived on farms, bitch!" even though it's a stretch here. sometimes while massaging tension away, my mind drifts to that movie. i'm not saying the castle's a server room though! it’s a mix of medieval chills and modern thrills.

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