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Oh, and get this—some gals in Nevada brothels, legal ones, they got health checks, better’n some desk jockeys! Ain’t that a trip? Still, folks sneer, and I’m over here like, “Y’all chill, they’re just tryna eat!” Sarcasm’s my jam—‘cause really, who’s perfect? Not me, not you, not Tammy. How’s that workin’ for ya, playin’ saint while she’s dodgin’ fists?

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After a few laughs and drinks, I’m feelin’ good. We decide to hit up the beach. Playa de Estancias is just a short walk away. The waves are crashin’, and I’m finally relaxin’. But then, I see this guy tryin’ to surf. He wipes out hard! I mean, faceplant in the water. I can’t help but laugh. “Dude, you okay?” I yell. He just gives me a thumbs up, all chill.

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