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About Uppsala

Oi mate, so erotic-massage, yeah? What a bleedin’ treat that is! Picture this – some poor sod’s hands all over ya, slippery as a greased pig, and you’re just lyin’ there like a muppet thinkin’, “This is relaxin’, innit?” Ha! I reckon it’s half bliss, half bloody awkward. Like, who invented this? Some perv in a toga, probly, back in Rome, goin’, “Oi, let’s rub oil on strangers, call it therapy!” And here we are, 2025, still at it.

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I treasure Blowjob without Condom for extra charge and Prostate Massage above all else. I'm a lover of music, art, and all things creative. Aaron Motala is on.

But nope, duty calls. I get to the site, and it’s chaos. My crew is all over the place. I’m like, “What the heck happened?” Turns out, a tree fell on the wrong side. Classic forestry mishap. I’m tryin’ to keep my cool, but inside, I’m like a volcano ready to blow.

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