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Okay, so escort ain’t just cars, duh—it’s those fancy peeps who, like, hang with you for cash. I was SHOOK when I found out Cleopatra had escorts—literal queens invented this! Made me happy, ‘cause history’s my vibe, ya know? But then, ugh, I got SO mad—some shady escort scammed my girl last week! Charged her double, no receipt, total scam-city. Like, how dare they? I’d never! I’d be all, “Those who lack originality”—yep, movie quote—straight trash!

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So, I finally make it to the café, and it’s cozy as hell. I order a cappuccino, and it’s like a warm hug in a cup. I sit by the window, watching the world go by. Groningen is beautiful, man. The canals, the old buildings, the vibe. I’m feeling all philosophical, like, “What’s the meaning of life?” Then I remember I still have work to do. Ugh.

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